Friday, May 15, 2009

Changing Outlook.....

Infertility has been my cross for far too long! I don't know what happened and I am not exactly sure how to explain it, but its done! I don't feel the burden like before and the pain doesn't feel as sharp! Perhaps I have finally (after so many years) have learned to except it. Or perhaps I have gotten over the angry bitterness that I have allowed to run rampant. I think in part its a decision that has been made.........
This past year or so I have felt a very strong urge to go back to school! However, with where we live currently that isn't an option. We have been looking at different areas, different agencies (my dear husband is in law enforcement) and different colleges. Well to make a long story short my husband has been invited to test with an agency!!! We will go down next week and Scott will do the PT test, Integrity Interview, Polygraph, and a report writing test. Please keep him in your thoughts and more importantly your prayers!

If we are lucky and blessed enough to receive a job offer (finger and toes are crossed).....I will wait a year (in-state residency) and start back to school! It is my hope to become an R.N. For what ever reason we haven't been blessed with children so instead of mourning my loss and inability why not make that my strength and help as many children as I possibly can. I might not be able to have one but why not help a thousand.


  1. Well, lookie you! What a great new opportunity for you BOTH - you know my prayers will go up for you and you can be certain taht if this is what's the path for you, you will be given the change to explore it fully.

    I can only imagine the pain your thoughts and the sadness you must have been having and although you will never forget, it may just be time to move on- package that in a box with a beautiful bow - and start a new chapter filled with hope, learning, anticipation and love.

    Good for you :-)


  2. I will keep you in my thoughts & prayers. I hope it works out for you!
    I'm glad you aren't struggling with infertility as much right now. Mine seems to come and go and right now is not the best time between it and myself, but maybe that was because of Mother's Day and now things will start to get better.

  3. Thank you so much for sharing of your journey! You are so strong and I have a lot to learn from you! I am excited for you upcoming journeys and excitements! Good luck and keep us posted. :)

  4. may i HIGHLY recommend foster care? it's a roller coaster, to be sure, but much less of one than infertility. at least, that's been our experience. it's unbelievably cathartic and wonderful. i don't know about your particular location's statistics, but here, 1 in 3 foster care placements lead to adoption. we love it.


  5. this is what's the path for you, you will be given the change to explore it fully.

    Work from home India